Don’t settle for less. This is something I have to remind myself of often. I am my own defeatist as much as I can be my own champion in my goals and dreams. Can you relate?
I have a passion that’s been a part of who I am since I first saw glimpses in high school. Well over a year ago, I started praying that God would take this passion away if it wasn’t meant to be a part of my life in a significant way. I asked God to limit opportunities for it to play out in my life. Then, of course, I would know it’s something that should be put aside.
Guess what? That hasn’t happened. In fact, more opportunities have presented themselves directly to me without my pursuit! At times, it’s almost humorous to me how much the opportunities have increased.
I’ve realized some of my doubt has been from my lack of imagination to see how it could play out in my life. I’ve also struggled to see how it fits within any given season of my life because I’m pretty sure it’s something I’ll never get paid to do. More doubt because I haven’t seen it come about naturally. And to that one, I say “really, Liz, when did anything just happen? Oh, wow, I just ran a half-marathon without hard work. Oh, I just got my masters overnight without taking the 1000 steps to complete the degree.” Do you hear my internal sarcasm to myself?
Realization: All those doubts DO NOT mean it isn’t supposed to be a part of my life in some significant way. It’s only taken most of my life to get to that realization!
So for the last six months, I’ve been journaling through the doubt. I’ve been praying, trusting, talking through with my husband and friends. Insert a meaingful book by Jo Saxton that I’ve been mulling over this past year, a podcast I’ve been listening to the last few months (Born to Be) and timely messages at church. Now, I’m seeking more answers and taking some steps forward.
I’m gaining confidence that it’s not a 30+ year diversion but something I’m meant to pursue. I don’t see it all clearly, but little by little I get a glimpse of what could be, and it gets me excited. It’s in the waiting and trusting that we become stronger and able to do what we are meant to do. Right?
What have you been pushing aside? What passion stirs in your soul that you can’t shake? What could it look like to pursue it along side your normal everyday life?
Stay tuned…I’m moving forward.